I missed my last few Christmas posts! I'm sorry about that. I'm still going to do them :)

Right now is going to be more of an update post on me with some Christmas things thrown in, so it counts as today's Christmas post!

I'm still in pain from the operation. I keep wondering when it's going to be done. I haven't slept well in a long time, it feels like. I can't sleep on my side, so I sleep sitting up, because I also can't sleep lying on my back because of the CF. I drift on and off all night. I keep the TV on to keep me company. I cannot WAIT to heal and be able to sleep like a normal person again.

The pain is withstandable for the most part during the day, but by night time I'm at my wit's end and I take a percocet. It scares me in what is probably a foolish way- I worry I'm addicted to one percocet a night. It's the only time I feel like myself anymore. The pain is so annoying I can't stand people touching me. I can't stand hearing people talk sometimes. I feel so bad for Andy, he gets my biting tongue far more often than he should. He deserves better, but I can't help it.

The one bright spot is my Christmas spirit. Saturday, I went to church for the first time in a few years, and it was very nice. The church was doing that Christmas Giving Tree thing I said that I loved from my childhood! So I grabbed an ornament. I got one for a ten year old girl who asked for a gift card to buy clothing. I'm thinking $50 from Old Navy? Does that sound good for a ten year old? I figured Old Navy is fairly cheap, and will have nice things for a girl that age. Some of the other ornaments made me sad- kids asking for winter coats, or things that are probably far too expensive, like a telescope. Why can't kids at least go untouched by poverty and sickness?

After I got home from church, I was really wiped. I think that was good though, because I slept pretty well. Sunday, I finished addressing Christmas cards, and then Andy and I decorated our tree. It's so pretty. Last year I didn't have any Christmas spirit, so we didn't do anything, but this year, Christmas cheer is keeping me going.

This coming Saturday, I'm having a combination Partylite/Christmas party. I'm looking forward to relaxing and seeing my friends so much. Even if it is while on percocet :)